


you can call me babe for the weekend (tis the damn season)

by ProbablyVoldemort



Category: Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (TV)
Genre: Dirty Dancing, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Mistletoe, Mountains, Sharing a Bed, Skiing, Snowmen, Team Building, Work trip
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:54:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28221228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ProbablyVoldemort/pseuds/ProbablyVoldemort
Summary: Zoey may have lied about having a boyfriend.  That lie may have also escalated into her bringing said imaginary boyfriend on the annual ski trip.  She may have been dealing with all of this by getting drunk in a bar, which is definitely the only reason she actually listened to Tobin's offer to find her a fake boyfriend.Leif was not who she would have picked.
Relationships: Zoey Clarke/Leif Donnelly
Comments: 16
Kudos: 32
Collections: Zoey's Playlist Secret Santa 2020





	you can call me babe for the weekend (tis the damn season)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ElliHelm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElliHelm/gifts).



> Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all of you, but especially to ElliHelm! You said you like fake dating, so here's some fake dating for you!!
> 
> This is a non-heartsong universe, because I didn't have the time to try to fit songs into this.
> 
> This is also my first time writing ZEP in general, so please go easy on me if characterizations aren't spot on. I haven't watched the show since it first came out, and I haven't had a lot of time to read fanfic, so just like don't judge anything that's off too harshly.
> 
> Title is from Tis The Damn Season by Taylor Swift, but this fic is in no way based off that song. I just thought these lyrics fit.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!! :)

Zoey was going to die.

That was literally the only way this weekend could end.

“I’m going to die,” she told the bartender, and then ordered another shot.

“Why are you going to die?”

She jumped out of her skin, and spun around.

“Jesus, Tobin,” she said, clutching her chest. Maybe this was how she’d die. Heart attack in a bar. Better than the alternative. “What are you doing?”

He hopped up on the barstool next to her. “Getting a drink,” he said, like it should be obvious, which, granted, it should have been. “So why are you gonna die?”

Zoey accepted her shot from the bartender and downed it. She considered not telling Tobin, but that wouldn’t really help anyone. And maybe she’d had too many drinks, but there was also a chance that Tobin could help.

“Okay,” she said, turning towards him. “Fine. But it stays between us.”

Tobin mimed zipping his lips shut, and Zoey sighed.

“Max asked me out,” she said. “The first time was months ago and he just keeps asking and acting like I’m the bad guy because I keep having to say no.”

“Dick move,” Tobin said, then held up his hands. “Sorry. Not talking.”

“You can talk,” Zoey assured him, deciding not to comment on the dick comment. She definitely agreed, but Max was still one of her best friends whether he was currently being a dick or not. “So last time he asked, I told him I have a boyfriend.”

Tobin nodded sagely, accepting his drink from the bartender. “And you don’t actually have a boyfriend.”

“Not even a potential one,” Zoey confirmed, groaning. “And I don’t think he believed me either. So then when everyone was signing up for this stupid ski trip and Joan was asking who needed plus ones, he’s like, _‘Oh, Zoey has a boyfriend. You’re gonna bring him on the trip, right?’_ So I had to say I needed a plus one and now, here we are, the night before the trip, with no plus one.”

“That’s tragic,” Tobin said, and ordered them another round.

They sipped on their drinks in silence for a few minutes, until Tobin gasped.

“This is actually perfect,” he said, grinning at her.

Zoey raised a brow. “I think you’ve got the wrong definition of perfect.”

“I have the perfect definition of perfect,” Tobin countered. “I have a plan. I’ll get you a fake boyfriend for the trip. It’s perfect.”

Zoey laughed. “Sure,” she agreed. “How many fake boyfriends do you have lined up at the last minute?”

Tobin shrugged. “Just one,” he said. “But I think he’d benefit from having a fake girlfriend, so you’re in luck.”

Zoey stared at him for a second. “Is this fake boyfriend you?” she asked, and he laughed.

“You wish you could fake get a piece of this.” He gestured at his entire body and did a weird sort of roll and Zoey laughed. “Don’t worry, Zo. I got this.”

And then he was dropping some cash on the bar, patting Zoey on the head, and disappearing into the night.

He texted her a couple hours later.

_Got you a man. He’ll pick you up at 7._

Which led to now, with Zoey waiting outside her building with her winter clothes and her skis for her fake boyfriend to pick her up.

There were a lot of questions that she had about this. Like, did she really trust Tobin’s judgement enough to let him pick out a fake boyfriend for her? Who did Tobin know who would be a fake boyfriend on such short notice? Why was this fake boyfriend picking her up? Was she making a terrible, horrible, life ruining mistake?

A car pulled over and Zoey rolled her eyes as Tobin stepped out of the driver’s seat.

“I thought you said you weren’t my fake boyfriend,” she said, and Tobin rolled his eyes.

“I’m not,” he said, walking towards the trunk. He jerked his thumb back towards the front of the car. “He is.”

And she had definitely made a mistake in trusting Tobin with this, because the person who got out of the passenger seat was definitely not someone who anyone would believe Zoey to be dating.

“Leif is supposed to be my fake boyfriend?” she asked, then waved. “Hey, Leif.”

“Hey,” he said, grabbing her skis and moving to attach them to the roof rack with the others. “I told you this was a terrible idea, Tobin.”

“It is not,” Tobin countered, and grabbed one of Zoey’s bags. She followed with the other towards the trunk, deciding that, fake boyfriend or not, they were still her best bet at a ride. “It’s a great idea.”

“How is this a great idea?” Zoey wondered, lifting her bag into the trunk. “No one is going to believe that Leif and I are dating. No offence, Leif.”

Leif waved her off. “None taken.”

Tobin sighed and crossed his arms.

“Okay,” he said. “Sure. Zoey, you lied about having a boyfriend and then lied about bringing him on the ski trip. Leif, you’re sure you’re gonna get drunk or lonely or both and sleep with Joan again. You both have a problem, and I have a solution. But, sure. Call me the bad guy.” He slammed the trunk shut. “Just get in the car.”

Tobin climbed back in the driver’s seat, and Zoey stood on the sidewalk, watching Leif attach her skis to the roof.

“You need a fake relationship, too?” she asked, and he looked at her over the roof and rolled his eyes.

“I didn’t lie about being in a relationship,” he told her, and, yeah, she deserved all the judgement in his voice. “But that could definitely be a solution for my problem, yeah.”

Zoey considered her options. There were only two, really.

Option 1: She didn’t fake date Leif for the weekend. Max found out she’d lied about having a boyfriend. They’d fight. She’d have a terrible ski trip even though she loved skiing—she was terrible at it, sure—but she loved it—and everything would suck.

Option 2: She _did_ fake date Leif for the weekend. Max would probably judge her for dating Leif, and they’d probably have to work really hard to sell their relationship because no one would just, like, believe it. She’d have to spend a lot of time with Leif, which wasn’t great but wasn’t as bad as it could be, and she’d hopefully be able to actually have some fun skiing.

Laying it out like that, there didn’t really seem to be much of a decision to make.

“Okay,” she said, nodding, and Leif glanced up from the roof rack again. “Okay. I’ll be your fake girlfriend.”

“Great,” Leif said, his face not betraying any emotion.

“Great,” Zoey echoed, and then climbed in the backseat. She had half a mind to argue that, as Leif’s official fake girlfriend, she should get the front seat, but they had hours of driving ahead of them and she didn’t want to start this fake relationship off on a bad foot by making Leif squeeze his giant legs into the backseat.

She could be a considerate fake girlfriend.

“I’m just saying,” Tobin started, “that this could solve all of both of your problems. Why would you come to me with your problems if you don’t want solutions? I—”

“We’re already fake together,” Leif said, climbing into the passenger seat. “You don’t need to sell us on it anymore.”

“Yeah,” Zoey agreed, doing up her seatbelt. “Leif’s the fake love of my fake life. We’re gonna get fake married one day and have fake babies and then fake die together as fake old people.”

“What a fake life,” Leif said, pretending to swoon.

Tobin started up the car and pulled away from the curb. “See,” he said, eyeing Zoey through the rear-view mirror. “I told you this was a great plan. Now. We need to figure out your backstory before we get there.”

Their backstory, mostly created by Tobin and then forcibly recited by Leif and Zoey for hours until they’d memorized it, went like this:

Zoey and Leif were both at a bar for separate reasons. Tobin had food poisoning and had to abandon Leif before a trivia competition. Zoey overheard Leif trying to convince the trivia organizer that he didn’t need a team to play, and offered to join his team. Both of being competitive as heck and refusing to lose, so they kicked ass at trivia. And, over a bond of trivia and shots, they realized they had a lot in common. In Tobin’s version, they hooked up right then in there, but in the version Zoey and Leif talked him down to, there was just a make-out. An earth-shattering, mind-blowing make-out, if they had to describe it, but nothing more graphic than that.

After that it got a little tricky. Neither Zoey nor Leif were usually the one to make the first move. In this situation in particular, though, Max was the main person they had to convince—the rest of the guys from the office probably wouldn’t care enough to ask for details, and, according to Tobin, at least, Leif had taken the lead at first in the whole Joan thing, which worked in their favour right now—so they decided it would be Leif who made the first move.

After the make-out, they were awkward a few days. Not particularly hard to have to fake, as they were both fairly awkward people in the first place. And then one day after they’d both worked late, they were walking out together and Leif asked if Zoey wanted to get a late dinner and she agreed, and the rest was history.

Zoey had told Max that she had a boyfriend about a month ago, so they picked a date a couple weeks early than that, enough time for them to have fully decided that they were dating by the time Zoey told Max.

It was, Zoey had to admit as they pulled up to the ski lodge late that afternoon, a pretty solid plan. They had more of the nitpicky details worked out, and the fact that neither of them were keen on PDA at work covered the lack of knowledge of their relationship between their coworkers. Zoey was pretty sure Max wouldn’t text Mo, but she sent him a text with the basics of the plan just in case. She got a string of crying laughing faces in response, so she figured that Mo had her back.

They had everything worked out. It was foolproof. Zoey and Leif were going to be the best fake couple ever.

It was cold as balls—Tobin’s words, not hers—when they stepped out of the car at the lodge. They piled their bags on a bag trolley, and then Zoey was left to wheel their stuff inside while Tobin went for the car and Leif went to check them in.

She managed to get it inside the lodge, and then leaned back against it, scanning the lobby. Most of the office had already arrived, and were either checking in or chatting with coworkers.

She didn’t see Max until he was already in front of her, and she sighed, pasting a smile on her face.

“Hey, Max,” she said, looking past him to see where Leif was at with checking them in. “How are you?”

“Good,” he said, and then made a show of glancing around. “Boyfriend couldn’t make it?”

“He made it,” Zoey assured him, and then felt the bag trolley move.

“I just need to get up to the room, take a twenty minute power nap, and then I’m hitting the bar,” Tobin said, hanging off the bar at the top of the trolley. “Fuck, it’s cold out.”

Max glanced at Tobin and then back at Zoey, raising a brow. “ _Tobin_ is your boyfriend?”

“No,” Zoey said, rolling her eyes. “That would be ridiculous.”

“Yeah,” Tobin agreed, hopping down. “She wishes she was cool enough to be dating all of this. I just drove her here.”

“Right,” Max said, glancing between them again. “So you boyfriend is where, then?”

“Checking us in,” Zoey said slowly. She crossed her arms. “It sounds like you don’t believe my boyfriend exists, Max.”

Max shrugged. “I’ll believe it when I see him,” he countered.

“Fine.” Zoey glanced past Max, watching Leif make his way over from the check in counter.

“Fine,” Max echoed.

Zoey turned away from Max as Leif came up, giving him a grin she hoped looked legit.

“Hey, babe,” she greeted, leaning into Leif as he leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. “Got our room?”

“Yeah,” he said, dangling the key cards from his hand, then tossed one over to Tobin. “Got yours too.”

Zoey turned back to Max, grinning at him as he stared at them in confusion and shock. “This is my boyfriend, Leif,” she said, gesturing at him. “I think you’ve met.” She turned back to Leif, resting her chin on his arm. “We should go put our stuff away.”

“Yeah,” Leif agreed, wrapping an arm around her. “I need to change into something warmer.”

Zoey grinned at Max. “See you at dinner.”

She kept her hold on Leif’s arm and he kept his other arm around her shoulders until the elevator doors closed behind them, and then they moved to a more reasonable distance apart.

“That went well,” Tobin said, leaning on the bags on the trolley and grinning at them. “Do you think he bought it?”

Zoey laughed and shook her head. “Absolutely not.” She elbowed Leif. “We gotta step up our game at dinner.”

Their room only had one bed, but that was a problem for bedtime. Technically there was another empty bed in Tobin’s room—SPRQ Point was kind of cheap in the room booking department, and the only reason Zoey had her own room to herself was because there were so few women in the company and because Joan loved her—but them taking the room with two beds or Leif still sleeping in Tobin’s room, both of those things were highly suspicious for people who were supposed to be dating each other.

So they were sharing a room with one bed. It was cool. Super cool. Zoey loved sharing beds with people she wasn’t romantically or sexually involved with. It was going to be a fun time.

But that was for later. For right now, they had to up their relationship-ness for dinner.

Because, as Zoey had predicted that morning before even agreeing to this plan, it was going to take a lot to convince Max that she and Leif were actually, legitimately a thing.

“Look,” Leif said, sighing. They were somehow alone in the elevator, which was great in that they had a few extra minutes to prepare themselves for the onslaught of Number One Couple they’d be performing this evening. He caught Zoey’s eye in the mirrored doors, tugging at the sleeve of his sweatshirt. “I’m sorry Tobin bullied you into this.”

Zoey laughed, loud and awkward, before catching it and faking a cough. Leif was watching her in amusement now, looking at her directly and not through the elevator mirrors, but that was fine.

“There was honestly not that much bullying,” she assured him. “I was pretty desperate to not admit that I’d lied about having a boyfriend. If anything, I’m sorry he bullied _you_ into this.”

“Yeah.” Leif shook his head, laughing softly, a look Zoey couldn’t decipher crossing his face. “There wasn’t much bullying on this end, either.”

It almost seemed like there was more meaning to his words than what he was saying, but Zoey didn’t have time to question it before the elevator was slowing to a stop.

“Ready?” she asked instead, holding out her hand.

“Born ready,” Leif answered, clasping her hand in his own.

And then they were stepping out into the lobby, heading for the banquet hall.

It was decked out for the holidays. Christmas trees in every corner. Tinsel and garlands hanging from the roof. Fake snow on every surface, despite the plenty of real snow outside. Most of the others had already arrived, but Tobin had saved them two seats at his table and waved them over.

“Don’t worry,” he said as they sat down, wiggling his eyebrows. “I made sure everyone knew you might be late cause you were going to pound town.”

“Thanks for that,” Zoey said, while Leif only closed his eyes and groaned. “Really appreciate it.”

Tobin snapped finger guns at her, and she settled into her seat, wondering how long it would be until dinner arrived.

“So you two are actually a thing?” Dave asked from Tobin’s other side, leaning forward to see them better. “Tobin wasn’t just making shit up?”

“Well, we weren’t late to dinner because we were ‘going to pound town,’” Leif corrected, making quotation marks around the words with his fingers. “But, yeah. We’re together.”

“Cool,” Dave said, and then went back to whatever conversation he’d been having before they joined the table.

That was, shockingly, all it took to convince the guys at their table that they were, to quote Dave, actually a thing. None of the guys really seemed to care much about their love lives.

It was great, in a way, because they were obviously convincing enough for the general public to believe them. But it was also disappointing, because it meant the time they spent figuring out how to up their game had so far been for nothing.

They’d need the upped game to convince Max, though. And Joan would see through them in a heartbeat if they weren’t convincing. Simon would probably be able to tell, too, but Zoey was fairly certain he wouldn’t blow their cover. So they _would_ need that extra oomph in their performance eventually.

It was just a little underwhelming in how easy the people of their table accepted their story.

They did get to share some of their backstory over dinner, though. While their coworkers didn’t seem all that interested in their love lives, some of their wives or girlfriends were. They got to practice their lovesick smiles and giggles and talking over each other as they told the story of how they got together.

And they ate it up. Those suckers.

They’d eaten though three courses when Zoey couldn’t hold it in anymore and had to head for the bathroom. She had no idea how many more courses were to come, but, judging on past ski retreats she’d been on, there would be a lot.

So she stood up and excused herself, kissing Leif goodbye on the cheek as she left.

She was leaving the bathroom when someone grabbed her by the arm, pulling her into a side hall. She pulled out of the grip, getting ready to tear off whoever it was’ face, and then recognized him.

“What the fuck, Max?” she asked, throwing up her hands.

Max leaned back against the wall, faux casual and raising an eyebrow at her. “You really expect me to believe you’re dating Leif?” he demanded, staring at her like she was crazy to even think he’d believe that. “ _Leif,_ Zoey.”

The emphasis on his name was a little insulting.

“Yeah,” she said, crossing her arms. “Yeah, Max. I _do_ expect you to believe that I’m dating Leif, because I am.”

“Zoey.” She honestly couldn’t think of another time her name had been said that condescendingly. “It’s _Leif_.”

Zoey shot him an unamused look. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

Max huffed, rolling his eyes. “We don’t _like_ Leif,” he said, almost like she might have forgotten that. “He’s stuck up and kind of a dick, and not someone you should be dating.”

“Okay.” Zoey shook her head, narrowing her eyes. “First of all, you don’t get to control who I date. And second of all, maybe he is those things, but there’s more to him than that.”

He scoffed. “Like what?”

Zoey was ridiculously over this conversation, but she wasn’t about to not defend her fake boyfriend’s honour. That wouldn’t be being a very good fake girlfriend.

And, yeah, Leif was stuck up and kind of a dick, but he wasn’t all bad. Definitely in the last few months he’d been less of a disrespectful dick and more of just kind of a guy with a slightly asshole-ish personality, which was something Zoey could appreciate.

“He’s funny,” was what she started with. “He’s very considerate and he always tips at least twenty five percent. He’s got a great butt. He’s—”

Max sighed, and tried to interrupt her with an exhausted sounding, “Zoey—”

“And you know what?” Zoey plowed on, going for the kicker. “I’m pretty sure that if I’d said no when he asked me out, he would have actually dropped it and not acted like I was the bad guy for not wanting to go out with him.” Max’s mouth snapped shut, and Zoey took a deep breath, stepping back into the main hallway. “Nice talking to you, Max.”

The dessert course had arrived by the time she made it back to her table, and she dropped heavily into her seat and downed the contents of her wine glass before she even registered what the food might be.

“Rough bathroom trip?” Leif asked quietly, leaning over.

Zoey sighed and stabbed her cake little too aggressively with her knife. “Ran into Max,” she told him, keeping her voice just as low. “We had a nice chat about what he thinks my love life should be.”

“Sounds fun,” Leif said dryly, and Zoey shrugged. “Do you need me to fight him? Because I could fight him. I can’t guarantee I’ll _win_ , but…”

Zoey laughed and shook her head. “No fighting required,” she assured him. “It’s fine. I mean, it’s _not_ fine, but I’ll live.”

“Good.” Leif nodded and dug into his cake. “What do we want to do after dessert?”

Zoey looked around the room. Some people were mingling around the tables. Others had moved to the far end of the banquet hall where there was space for a dance floor and props and a photographer for cheesy photos. She was sure others had already disappeared back to their rooms.

There was a part of her that wanted to do just that, to head up to her room and curl up in bed and obsess over what Max had said.

But there was another, bigger part of her that decided, for whatever reason, that if she left this dinner-party-thing before Max, that meant that Max won.

“Dancing?” she suggested, and Leif grinned at her.

Something Zoey had already known about Leif was that he, like her, had absolutely no rhythm. Which was absolutely great for flailing around on the dance floor and ensuring that no one got too close to them.

What she hadn’t known about him before was that, despite being completely incapable of following the beat of the song, Leif had _moves_.

Her current favourite had to be the full-body rolls, which definitely weren’t doing anything for her. Nope. She just enjoyed watching his body rolls for purely scientific reasons.

“You have to teach me how to do that,” she told him, laughing as she tried to mimic the move and almost dislocated her, well, everything.

“It’s like this,” he said, doing one in slow motion. Zoey attempted to copy him, and somehow ended up sprawled on the floor.

“I think I did something wrong,” she laughed, pushing herself back to her feet.

Leif laughed with her, shaking his head. “Let me show you,” he offered, and then suddenly he was behind her and their bodies were pressed together and Zoey was finding it hard to breathe.

“It’s like this,” he said, voice low, his breath tickling her ear and sending shivers down her spine. His hand pressed against her stomach, and then he was slowly doing the roll, taking her with him through the movements.

The way they were moving was completely at odds with the rhythm of the cheery Christmas music playing around them, and there was no other way to describe it than fucking hot. Zoey was fairly certain she blacked out for most of Leif’s demonstration, and her brain had evacuated the party and disposed of the people around them in favour of being back upstairs in their hotel room.

And then it was over, and the party and the people and the Mariah Carrey came crashing back into the forefront of her mind, but Leif still wasn’t moving away.

“You think you got it?” he asked, and she didn’t really process his words, only the feeling of his words against her ear and the fact that his voice had gotten lower and rougher since the last time he’d spoken, so she mumbled something vaguely like agreement in response. “You take the lead this time, then. Show me what you got.”

She did process that. The problem with taking the lead was that she still had no idea what she was supposed to do, but she wasn’t about to tell her fake boyfriend that she _really_ liked having him pressed up against her back and rolling his hips like that, so she gave it her best shot.

She got the first half. She was pretty sure she got the first half, at least, and, by the way Leif’s hand tightened on her stomach, she didn’t even care if she got it right because there was clearly something about it that was _right_ , you know?

But, as was on par with Zoey as, like, an entity, she messed up the second half, and they ended up sprawled on the ground and taking three other guests with them.

“Well,” Zoey said, standing up, her brain back to semi-normal functioning now that she wasn’t completely pressed up against Leif. “I think dancing should probably be over before we kill someone.”

“Probably a good plan,” he agreed, and they scurried from the dance floor.

They stood on the sidelines in relative silence for a few minutes, accepting some champagne from a passing waiter. Zoey could see Leif dragging a hand through his hair from the corner of her vision, but couldn’t look at him.

What the hell was that? That was some full contact, foreplay-esque, dirty dancing that she had just been doing with Leif. With _Leif_. It was one thing to fake date him and defend him to Max. It was another to practically grind on him in the middle of the dance floor on the first night of their company ski trip.

What was wrong with her?

And why had she been so into it?

Her gaze landed on Simon, who cocked his head and raised an eyebrow. Zoey shrugged back, and Simon shook his head and laughed. She wasn’t really sure what that meant or what she’d communicated, but apparently Simon was cool with it.

And then her gaze found the photo area. No one was there right now, and Zoey had a sudden urge to have a bunch of dumb pictures taken.

She took stock of herself first, though, making sure her heartrate had returned to normal and that she no longer had any weird urges to jump Leif. After deeming it safe, she turned to her fake boyfriend.

“We’re doing a photoshoot,” she declared, and then dragged him across the hall.

Leif was a good sport about the photoshoot, posing in Santa hats and in reindeer antlers, and with the various props. They were in the process of one very creative photo in which Leif was holding Zoey’s leg up with an oversized candy cane while Zoey held large gumdrops onto Leif’s chest as boobs, when a group of guys from work started crowding around, laughing and making weird faces at them.

“Oh, sorry,” Zoey said, dropping the gumdrop boobs and attempting to gracefully retract her leg from the candy cane. “Were you waiting for a turn?”

“We were not,” Greg said, and then pointed at something behind them. “We were waiting for that.”

Zoey turned around and found Adam from accounting standing behind them, a shit eating grin on his face and a candy can striped stick in his hands. She followed the length of the stick upwards, and found the one prop they’d managed to avoid in their photoshoot marathon.

“Mistletoe,” Leif identified dully.

“It’s not just you.” Zoey turned and found Tobin sitting backwards on a nearby chair. She wondered how long he’d been there. “They’ve been doing this to literally everyone all night. Don’t feel special. I had to make out with Mike earlier.”

“And it was the best make out of your life,” Mike shot back, and Tobin tipped his glass at him.

She turned back to Leif as everyone started chanting for them to kiss, watching the same process that was going on in her thoughts reflected on his face.

It was only a kiss. She’d kissed people and had it mean nothing before. She could do it again. And, anyway, everyone here thought she and Leif were dating. It would be astronomically weirder if they didn’t kiss.

They came to the same conclusion at the same time, and Zoey shrugged to Leif and he shrugged back.

And then he was leaning down and threading a hand into her hair, and she was reaching up to wrap her arms around his neck.

And then they were kissing, their lips moving together like their bodies had earlier on the dance floor. She felt his hand tighten in her hair, and she whimpered against his lips, pushing herself closer and deepening the kiss.

It wasn’t until she pulled back to breathe and the wolf whistles of her colleagues came crashing back in that she remembered where she was and just who she was making out with.

“Show’s over,” she told them, pulling back and shaking her head, ignoring how raspy her voice had gotten and how hard she was breathing. “Back to your regularly scheduled party activities.”

She peeked a glance at Leif, who had a dazed look on his face and a hand shoved into his hair, and then couldn’t trust herself to look at him anymore.

What had gotten into her? First that dancing, which could be easily explained by her need to learn how to properly do a body roll. Definitely a plausible excuse for why he had to completely press himself up against her.

But then that _kiss_? Holy mother of fuck. They could have gotten away with a peck. There would have been ribbing, definitely, but all that was needed was a peck. That was full on making out, and holy _shit_ why was she so into making out with Leif?

She could have just kissed him. Something brief and chaste and sweet, not something that had Tobin wiggling his eyebrows like that at her.

She glanced away from Tobin and his eyebrows, and found Max, standing a bit of a ways away with some of their other coworkers, an almost confused look on his face as he stared at the photoshoot area.

That was a good reason. That was a _great_ reason for her to have just made out with Leif the way she had. Sure, _maybe_ she hadn’t known Max was anywhere nearby when she’d started making out with Leif, but that was just semantics. That make out was not the make out of two people pretending to be dating, and, by the look on Max’s face, Zoey was pretty sure they’d gained some ground in convincing him that this was legit.

And that was definitely the only reason that Zoey had kissed Leif like that.

The guys around them had vacated the photobooth, ready to lie in wait for the next victims of their mistletoe scam.

“I think I’m ready to get out of here,” Leif said, and Zoey nodded.

“Yup,” she agreed, and then hesitated for a second before grabbing his hand.

She dropped it again in the elevator.

“Should we talk about that?” Leif asked, not sounding like he wanted to talk about it.

Zoey shook her head. “It’s only weird if we make it weird,” she said, and he laughed.

The drive to the resort had been so long, they were so full of the multiple courses of food and alcohol, and the adrenaline from their dancing and their kissing was wearing off, so neither of them had much to suggest other than going straight to bed as soon as they reached their room. They had to be up early for team building day, anyway.

Zoey lay in bed next to Leif, eyes wide open as she stared up at the ceiling. The bed was big enough that they had space to spare, but she was extremely aware of Leif lying a foot away.

“It’s only weird if we make it weird,” Leif echoed her words from earlier in the dark, and Zoey laughed and tried to relax.

She woke up the next morning with him sprawled completely on top of her, which was not what she’d been expecting.

_It’s only weird if we make it weird_ , she thought to herself, and then turned her head to try to catch the clock on the bedside table.

_Shit!_

“Leif, we slept in,” she said, shoving at his sleeping body. “Leif! We need to get up now! Or we’re gonna be late!”

It took a second, but then he was flying off of her and into the bathroom. She heard the shower start after a moment, and sighed. Her hair would have to be good enough in braids today, because there was definitely not enough time for them both to shower.

A tiny part of her brain pointed out that if they _really_ wanted to sell this whole dating thing, she could just join Leif in the shower, but she ignored that part.

She was dressed warmly—as per the instructions texted her by Joan at apparently 5am—and had her hair braided back by the time Leif re-emerged from the bathroom, also ready to go for the day.

“Too busy having sex to be on time for breakfast?” Tobin asked as they joined him at a table. Everyone else was finishing eating or already finished, and they were going to have to speed eat if they didn’t want to go to the teambuilding on an empty stomach.

“Yes,” Leif agreed. “That’s exactly what we were doing.”

Zoey hummed around her mouthful of waffle. “So much sex.”

Joan pulled her aside as they were leaving the banquet hall, and Zoey waved Leif on without her.

“So you and Leif, huh?” she asked, grinning at her in a way that Zoey couldn’t really read.

“Yep,” she said. “Me and Leif.”

Joan’s grin widened, and she slapped Zoey on the shoulder. “Good for you,” she said. “That boy’s been in love with you for, like, half a year. How’s it going?”

Zoey was a little bit stuck on Joan’s definitely completely wrong assumption that Leif had been in love with Zoey for, like, six months, but managed to pull herself together enough to form an answer.

“Good,” she said, nodding definitely way too much and way too quickly. “It’s going great. He’s great. It’s great. We’re great.”

“Great,” Joan echoed, and slapped her shoulder again. “Don’t forget to file it with HR when we’re back in the office.”

“Will do,” Zoey called as Joan walked away.

She wondered if she should get stuck on the whole _Joan thinks Leif’s been in love with her for six months_ thing, but then decided that she didn’t have the spare time or energy to devote to that so she was just going to forget it instead. Leif was under the impression that he’d be hooking up with Joan on this trip if he didn’t have a fake girlfriend, so there was absolutely no reason for Joan to think that Leif was in love with anyone.

She was simply mistaken.

Most of the morning was spent on the basic team building exercises. Human pyramids. Trust exercises. Blindfolded trust skiing. Ice breakers. The usual.

There wasn’t much need for broadcasting a convincing relationship when you were focused on winning at team building, and she was only occasionally in Leif’s group at all. It was altogether a very ordinary and uneventful day of team building.

Until she was partnered with Leif for the snowman building contest after lunch.

Joan gave her a big wink when she announced their pairing, like she was being subtle in pairing them together, and Zoey tried to ignore the way she felt at the lazy grin Leif sent her.

It was definitely something she ate and definitely not butterflies. That would be ridiculous.

“Ready to kick some ass?” Leif asked, and Zoey accepted his high five.

“Hell yeah I am.”

There were some really good things about being paired with Leif for this competition. The first was that the only person as competitive as Zoey in the office was Leif, so they were definitely guaranteed to win at team building. Or snowman building. Or snowteam building? Whatever. They were going to win.

The second was that, because they were both so competitive and because everyone else at the office knew just how competitive they were, no one would be expecting them to be playing up their relationship while building their snowman. Which meant that Zoey could put all her energy into winning and not have to spare any on wondering whether she looked like she was into Leif the correct amount.

It was great.

They did stretches at the edge of their designated snowman building area as they waited for Joan to start the exercise, already talking game on how to build the ultimate snowman.

And then the whistle blew and they were off.

Zoey started rolling snowballs while Leif went to raid the snowman accessories bin for the best pieces. Once he returned, he took over the biggest snowball and Zoey went to work on the last one. By the time the balls were finished, they’d taken most of the snow from their designated area, and it took both of them to lift the middle one onto the bottom. Zoey was glad that Leif was so ridiculously tall, as he could barely reach to put the head on top.

With a quick look at the time, they went about shaping the snowman, Zoey working with the bottom and Leif working with the top. After that, it would be features and accessories.

There was something nice about working with Leif. There wasn’t much of Zoey’s brain that wasn’t dedicated to winning the snowman contest, but that bit of it was considering how nice this was. Leif wasn’t as much of a dick as she’d previously thought, and it was actually fun working with him. Their control and perfectionism meshed well together, and it turned them into a well oiled machine.

There was also the fact that he made this really cute face when he was concentrating, and the way he brushed his hand against her back as he leaned around her, and the look in his eyes as he smiled at her when they finished ahead of schedule, their snowman about nine feet tall and glorious and perfect.

The warm, fluttery feeling was back in her stomach again, but she was definitely just cold.

They stood next to each other in the group of contestants as the floor leads evaluated the snowmen. Her arm brushed against Leif’s, and she was leaning against him without even thinking about it. She half concentrated on a conversation she was having with one of the guys, but most of her attention was caught on the vague feeling of Leif’s thumb brushing against her waist over her winter coat.

“Attention! Attention everybody!” Joan called, waving her arms at the group. “As you can probably already tell, there was a clear winner to this team building exercise. So congratulations to Zoey and Leif. You can both add ten points to your overall score for today. And in second place we have…”

Zoey tuned Joan out as soon as her name was called, turning to Leif with her hands spread and a grin on her face.

“We did it!” Leif said, throwing his arms out. “We kicked all of your asses!”

“We won!” Zoey yelled, which was probably, definitely poor sportsmanship.

She wasn’t sure what made her do what she did next. It probably wasn’t poor sportsmanship. It might have been hypothermia setting in. It might have just been a combination of excitement and adrenaline and the fact that she’d really, really enjoyed doing it last night and wanted to do it again.

Whatever the reason, she sent herself flying at Leif, leaping off the ground so he had to catch her in his arms. And then she was wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him.

It was nowhere near as heated as their mistletoe kiss last night, and didn’t last anywhere near as long. Leif could only hold her in the air for so long, and the sound of their coworkers’ heckling was so much closer and louder and harder to ignore.

But she kissed him, and it was just as good, just as sweet and amazing and swoon worthy as the night before.

And then it was over, and she was stumbling out an apology to Joan, who was sending them an unamused look for interrupting her rewards ceremony.

Leif’s hand found hers, and she found herself fighting off a stupid grin as she clutched it, wondering how she could go about getting another taste of his lips.

The rest of the afternoon was torture, pure and simple.

Joan clearly had it out to get them after their post-snowman stunt, and she and Leif weren’t on the same team for any of the remaining exercises.

But that didn’t stop Leif from watching her from across the room the way he was, intoxicating and all consuming and impossible to look away from. The soft way he smiled at her when she caught him looking, the glint in his eye, it was all so, so distracting.

She could barely concentrate on winning the rest of the team building stuff, and that was saying something. Nothing could distract her from winning.

As she was trying to arrange herself by age with the rest of her group without using her voice, her mind was far away, on the other side of the room with Leif.

She liked him.

There was no way around that thought anymore. She liked Leif. She _like-liked_ Leif. It was an insane thought, and yet here she was.

She liked kissing him. She liked touching him. She liked waking up with him on top of her. She liked the feeling of him pressing up behind her as they rolled their body. She liked goofing around with him at the photoshoot, and she liked working together to kick ass.

She liked him.

And, from the way he was currently smiling at her, ignoring the fingers being waved in his face by his silent teammates, he just might like her, too.

The last exercise finished, and Zoey didn’t even hear who’d gotten the most teamwork points over the day before she was moving to Leif’s side.

“I need to get changed before dinner,” she told him, searching his face. It wasn’t really a lie, either. She’d warmed up from the inside exercises too much to continue to wear all these layers. “Wanna go back to the room?”

“Yes,” he said, almost before the words were out of her mouth.

In the elevator ride up, even though they were alone, she didn’t drop his hand, and he didn’t drop hers, either.

The door to their room closed behind them, and Zoey was suddenly nervous.

She was torn between just pulling Leif down to her height and kissing him silly, or telling him how she felt first.

Thankfully, he decided for her.

“Zoey,” Leif said, smiling that soft smile that melted her insides. He grabbed her hands in both of his, brushing his thumbs against her knuckles. “I need to tell you something, and I need you to listen, and if it makes things weird, that’s okay, but I need to tell you.”

“Okay,” she whispered, not sure why she was whispering.

Leif took a deep breath and then let it out through his nose.

“I didn’t actually need a fake date for this trip,” was not anywhere near what she was expecting him to say. He smiled at her, and Zoey found herself unable to not smile back, even though she wasn’t sure where he was going with this. “I like you, Zoey. I’ve liked you for a while. When you told Tobin that you needed a fake boyfriend, he decided that this was my chance. And maybe it wasn’t the smartest plan to agree to be fake in love with you for the weekend, but I didn’t have any better ideas. So. I like you. If we’re doing any more of this, I want it to be for real.”

Zoey couldn’t say anything for a minute, too busy trying to process all of that. For some reason, her mind got stuck on Joan’s words that morning. If Joan had been right, and now Zoey was thinking she was, Leif had been into her—not Joan’s words, but Zoey was trying not to think about Joan’s actual words right now—for like six months. Six _months_. That was a long time.

And, yeah, Zoey was definitely crazy into Leif, too, but that had started literally yesterday, not six months ago.

_How had he been into her for six months without her noticing?_

But now that she was thinking about it, there _had_ been something different about Leif. She’d even mentioned it to Max the night before. She wasn’t sure when it changed, she was beginning to understand the why, but Leif had gotten nicer to her. When there were bugs, he’d start trying to fix them without gloating at her first. When she’d forgotten both her lunch and her wallet, he was the one who’d come back with her usual lunch order from the deli down the street.

And now that she was thinking about it, she’d been willingly spending more time with him before this weekend, too. If she ran into him outside of work, they’d chat instead of ignoring each other. If she saw him in a bar, she’d have a drink with him before returning to whoever she’d come with.

And now that she was thinking about it, she’d really liked this change in Leif, had been trying to find a way for them to be actual friends and not just coworkers. She’d been wanting to spend more time with him. While Tobin’s fake dating plan hadn’t been exactly how she’d wanted to spend that time, she’d still agreed.

Maybe she hadn’t had feelings for him before this weekend, but now that she was thinking about it, that was definitely a possible future outcome from the ways she _had_ been thinking about him. Maybe their kiss after the snowman competition had really been inevitable.

And Zoey had no idea if anything she did with Leif would work out in the long haul. They’d only been semi-friends for a few months, and she’d only started feeling overtly non-platonically towards him yesterday. There was no guarantee that this would work out.

But, for once, no part of Zoey wanted to overthink it.

So she stepped closer to him, let a nervous grin spread across her face.

“I’m in if you’re in,” she told him, eyes searching his.

It took him a second, but then his lips widened in a grin.

“I’m so in,” he whispered, and then he was kissing her again and Zoey never wanted to stop.

Needless to say, they were late to dinner.

Also needless to say, Tobin’s face would have been completely insufferable if they hadn’t been completely blissed out on the reason they were late to dinner.

The last day of the retreat was a free-for-all day, in which everyone was allowed to do basically whatever they wanted. Zoey usually spent it skiing.

This year, Zoey and Leif didn’t even make it down to breakfast until lunch, and then their afternoon on the slopes was spent with more making out in snow drifts than actually skiing. They were only out a few hours before returning to their room to “warm up”.

She ran into Max the next morning as they were checking out of the hotel, and internally groaned at whatever was going to be coming from their conversation.

But then Max held up his hands as he approached her.

“I’m sorry,” he said, and Zoey just blinked at him. “I’ve been an ass. I don’t know why. You haven’t deserved anything I’ve been putting you through. Obviously I shouldn’t expect you to date me just because I asked you. I’m sorry.” He sighed, dropping his hands. “I miss you, Zo. You’re my best friend, and I haven’t really talked to you in months. And that’s completely my fault, I know that, but I’m just asking if you think we could give being friends another shot.”

Zoey nodded slowly. “Yeah,” she said, because she did really miss having Max as her friend, and because he really did sound sincere. “Yeah. Okay.”

Max grinned at her, and she smiled back.

“So,” he said. “You and Leif, huh? That’s, like, actually for real. You’re happy with him?”

Zoey considered telling Max that her and Leif had only actually gotten together yesterday, but they’d only been friends again for like five seconds. She didn’t want to jeopardize that by admitting to a lie that wasn’t even a lie anymore. Maybe she’d tell him one day.

She looked across the lobby instead, towards where Leif was leaning against the check out counter, and smiled.

“Yeah,” she said. “Yeah. He makes me really happy.”

Max smiled back, and it was a little strained, but it was still a smile.

“That’s good,” he said. “I’m happy you’re happy.”

Later that day, after hours of driving and listening to Tobin gloating about being the absolute best matchmaker slash wingman to have ever existed and how he deserves _at least_ to be given their firstborn in exchange for making this happen, Zoey finally arrived back home.

She and Leif weren’t particularly helpful in the unpacking of her things. To be fair, though, making out was infinitely more enjoyable than unpacking suitcases from a trunk.

After a final kiss goodbye, a confirmation of their plans for the next night, an eyeroll from Tobin accompanied by his “sincere regrets” for making this a thing, and then a _final_ final kiss goodbye, Zoey was back inside her building.

Mo heard her banging her way up the stairs and met her on the landing.

“So,” he said, eying her like he already knew the answer to whatever he was going to ask. “How’d the whole fake boyfriend thing go?”

Zoey finished hauling her stuff up the stairs and then leaned back against her door. “Well,” she said, shrugging, unable to stop the grin from spreading across her face. “I have a non-fake boyfriend now, so I’m gonna say it went good?”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed!!!!
> 
> Comments and kudos give me life!!!
> 
> Come find me on Tumblr at Probably-Voldemort!!
> 
> Hope you all have a safe and happy holiday!!!


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